At the age of 25, research suggests, a woman should be thinking about a long lasting relationship. For a man, 28 years is often the time to start thinking about making a long term commitment to a relationship.
But in a fast moving world, while most women are still willing to settle down,fewer and fewer men are willing to go into a relationship for the long haul.
The reason is tied to the belief that happiness in life is found in having successful careers and not in enjoying great spousal relationships. False!
Happiness is the evidence of an all rounded life that rests upon the fulcrum of a successful long lasting relationship.
If you don’t believe this now, you may have regrets later when you realize at old age that a great life was frittered away without a long lasting relationship.
Building a long lasting relationship is possible. If you have made up your mind to do it then consider taking the following steps.
- Fall in Love with a human being,
Human beings should go into relationships founded on love and nothing else.
Human beings are not perfect and no relationship will ever make human beings perfect.
And they shouldn’t bother about perfection because when it’s all about love, nothing else will matter and achieving a long lasting relationship will be possible when love is the leader.You
Recognizing the imperfections of your spouse will be a frequent reminder to forgive and forget misdeeds.
Each act of forgiveness without the harboring of grudges will create an atmosphere to love in more better ways.
2. Stay in love with a human being.
From the above, recognizing that there is no long lasting relationship without love gives the ability to forgive and forget.
And does more, it should give you the capacity to stay in love with a human being who will offend you sometimes and make you laugh at other times.
Yes, a relationship is a potpourri of bitterness and sweetness.
But you know what? The longer it lasts, the more the bitterness space shrinks. A time will eventually arrive when two shall become great friends who can do one another no harm.
Don’t insist on being apologized to before you forgive. Or don’t wait until punishment served in the form of avoidance or withdrawal bexomes unbearable for your spouse, before you forgive and pull closer. Forgive easily and move on quickly.
What quick forgiveness entails is clothing oneself with a permanent aura of reconciliation and humility.
Be humble to take the first step towards reconciliation. There is no room for pride in a relationship, it is just the two of you; with nothing to prove to any one.
If your partner has an issue of pride at the beginning, wouldn’t the lesson on the rewards of humility be better taught through actions? It’s possible. Love always wins.
Bitterness quickly weeded out leaves the space for love to thrive and for the relationship to last.
4. Share dreams.
Being in a relationship doesn’t sound the death nail on individual dreams. What great relationships do for all parties is to improve conditions for the realization of individual dreams. It makes the “two good heads are better than one” a reality.
So, if you want a long lasting relationship then you should support your partner’s dreams in all ways you could.
Help them overcome the fears and the doubts they may have on their way to realizing their dreams.
Go the extra mile to learn and share approaches they could adopt to realize their dreams faster. But don’t suspend your dream.
Share your dream with your partner too.
Share your struggles and prospects with them. Seek their input but don’t get angry or withdraw your support when they seem slow in showing any interest in your own project.
Some will not give support until the see the first sign of success.
If it could be done, coalesce your dream and your partner’s dream into one that both of you could work on. Spouses who work together with same objectives and goals in constant view tend to enjoy a long lasting relationship.
5. Share responsibilities and duties.
Responsibilities and duties shouldn’t have no go areas. However, responsibilities and duties should be defined but with a fluidity that allows one to step up and stand in for the other without any complaints.
Doing the dishes, the laundry, paying some specified bills and others shouldn’t be left undone or unpaid because the one meant to do can’t when it’s supposed to be done.
Love makes it easy for one to take over and help a friend out. These understanding and camaderie are what make partners find one another dependable and irreplaceable.
The dependability and irreplaceability are what make a long lasting relationship
6. Share long, frank, fun-filled and frequent talk time.
A long lasting relationship is molded and solidified through a consistent frank, heart to heart and fun filled talk time.
A time to talk is the best time to learn more about one another. You do know that learning is a continuous process, don’t you?
If you want to know your partner better, there is no better place to put the concept of continuous learning to use than in a relationship. Secrets from the past and weaknesses are revealed during periods of a frank heart to heart talk.
Such Revelations are just what you need to know in order to understand your partner better.
You learn and keep learning from every talk time, best ways to make your relationship a long lasting one.
7. Keep no secrets.
As mentioned above, if you want to enjoy a long lasting relationship then keep no secrets.
Use the time for the heart to heart talk to open up and share those long bottled up secrets. Every one has made a mistake before and there is no one who hasn’t erred.
Every adult, up to the age of desiring a long lasting relationship should accept human imperfections and shouldn’t hold the past against any one.
Since a relationship is meant for adults, secrets should be shared. It is better to reveal such secrets than for those secrets to be discovered later by your partner.
The discovery may have the potential to erode trust and put an end to what would have been a long lasting relationship.
8. Be honest. Don’t pretend,
Honesty is key to building a long lasting relationship. Except there is a need to protect your spouse against an emotional trauma, it pays to let your partner know how you feel at all times.
Show you are angry when you have to and thereafter, show that you have moved on..
Be human, don’t pretend to be who you are not. When you wear a mask, you are likely to be taken for who you are truly not.
9. Be empathetic,
Wear your partner’s shoes.
If you don’t do so when you should, you.msy not really understand what they are going through when you should.
It’s the aproximate visualization of discomfort that makes it possible to respond appropriately.
Empathizing supplies the resources to help a partner out of difficult situations that would have been overlooked.
That is, empathizing takes you to where you can help a friend in need.
10. Stand as a team against external aggression
A house divided itself cannot stand. Challenging times are going to come in different ways.
However.no matter how challenging, a united team will triump at the end.
One of the times to together is when challenges come up.
A challenging time is not the time to apportion blames and abandon a spouse in need of a support.
It’s the time to offer words of encouragement, inspire belief, confidence and optimism.
So, when an ill wind comes blowing, come together and withstand it as a family.until it blows over.
What it will leave in it wak,e will be a condusive atmosphere to build a long lasting relationship.
12. Cover weaknesses of one another,
The time a partner falls short of expectations is not the right time to blame yourself for getting into the relationship in the first place.
When your partner fails to rise up to the occasion, it’s time to demonstrate a high level of understanding. Your partner may not just be cut out to play the part expected of them, so what should you do?
Dig deep into your untapped potential and cover your partner’s weakness and smoothen the path to two truly becoming one.
When two become, a long lasting relationship is built.
13. Don’t be presumptuous
When you suspect something, don’t conclude until you have the chance to hear from your spouse.
Being presumptuous is a recipe for wrongfully, sowing the seed of doubt and opening the door to self destruct your relationship.
When you hear or suspect something, hear from your spouse, make genuine efforts to believe and stay committed to making the relationship last.
14. Be patient.
Every long lasting relationship is built on patience. Building a long lasting relationship is like building an empire. It’s going to take time.
Building it successfully will take patience and péseverance.
15. Be ready to put in the hard work.
Finally, building a long lasting relationship is going to take hard work. It’s not going to be easy but it can be done through hard work.
So when you want to build a long lasting relationship, you should be ready to put in the hard work.